Fifteen:

"Dither not, Monsieur le Brian," said Spot. "Only by moments are we have lost the opportunity to rescue Mademoiselle and Monsieur les Parents."

"I'll get my parents back when the police give you back to the clowns," said Brian.

"No," said Spot. "As King of the World, I take the challenge to retrieve Mademoiselle and Monsieur les Parents personally myself. Besides, the monsieur I win the radio contest from? He says to wait here to be taken to the King of the World crowning..."

"—wait where?" said Brian. "Our home? How would they know where we lived? Do you even know how to tell anyone where we live?"

"I tell them nothing of the jibber-jabber of the human addresses," said Spot. "They simply tell me to return across the street to the home of Monsieur le Brian. Now, be good and give me the bath before the crowning. Let me push the tubful of water all over you and I may also be good and still remember you after I rescue your parents."

"Pardon me for the interruption, Your Majesty," said Sweaty Pete. "It looks like we have some company."

"I am Sir James," said the rider. "I seek to duel the new king."

"Why has everyone heard of a King of the World except me?" said Brian.

"The PBS News Hour only now reported the succession," said the knight. "If the King will not fight, then I will fight you as his champion."

"Stand aside, Monsieur le Brian," said Spot. "I need no assistance with the upstart. Engarde, monsieur."

"Ahem," said the peg-legged stranger.

"Excuse me," said the knight. "The new king and I were about to duel. Can we help you with something?"

"Its Majesty Spot has not yet formally received its crown," said the stranger. "Until then, the dog you seek to duel is of uncertain pedigree."

"...blimey." The knight withdrew.

"Who are you?" said Brian.

"I am radio's Cosimo D. Mimbleshaw," said the stranger. "To retrieve the new king's rightful crown and release your parents, I must deliver us to Kansas City."

"Kansas City? The harshest of New Jersey's Badlands?" said Brian. "Wait, both legs? You have two peg legs?"

"It was the only way to pass as any kind of man at all." Mimbleshaw threw off his disguise.

"A chimpanzee," said Brian. "That talks. And what's your story? King of Mars? I can take you to our leader."